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About Deviant Artist Senior Member Jenny (Romanchuk) AdamsFemale/Canada Recent Activity
Deviant for 12 Years
Core Member 'til Hell freezes over
Statistics 359 Deviations 7,760 Comments 1,128,465 Pageviews

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Dateline - "Infatuation"
             
This is going to be a 2 hour documentary about Flutterby727 

I'm frightened to see this. I don't know if I can. It's so very different to watch a show about someone who you cared about... And its so very different than an accident or 'natural causes'--
I have problems saying the "M" word when speaking about her--its like the words are kind of foreign, clumsy, or they fade in my mouth draining my voice--when I do speak it-- it sounds forced and it feels like an explosion of just the gravity of what that word means just implodes inside my head and all around me--just the whole weight of what happened to her... Shelley was one of the first followers of my comic. She was so supportive-- I would often write and draw the comic thinking about her "wow I can't wait to see what she thinks of this!"-- she would ask questions about how to draw something--or things about writing a silly parody comic of TZH-- But now I'm wracking my brain and struggling to remember and preserve all the little pieces of contact I have had with her-- I haven't deleted any of Shelley's emails--but I'm afraid to read them-- I hope my responses we good-- I can't remember--which upsets me even more--not remembering everything-- I want to believe desperately that I was a good friend or even an acquaintance to her. But I don't know--and probably never will.
I'll have nightmares about it--cruel nightmares where I save her and everything is okay, or ones where she's missing and it's my fault that I can't find her before it's too late. I'm mad at myself for taking her friendship for granted--for not getting to know her better when she was alive--I'm mad at the monster who took her from her mom and dad, her sisters, and the rest of her family--I'm mad at the fact that I feel so helpless and isolated--I know how long you grieve isn't a measurement on how much you loved someone, I know there is no such thing as closure just 'a new normal' but its really hard to stop reading the book of pain so much and put it back on the shelf when you feel like you don't have all the answers-- because the book is just a bunch of blank pages-- of whats, why's, and what-could-have been.
  • Listening to: Walk the Rain by the Sneaker Pimps
  • Reading: Webcomics

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:iconneko-kumicho-chan:
neko-kumicho-chan Featured By Owner Jul 2, 2016  Hobbyist General Artist
thank you so much for the watch! :hug: >W< :heart:
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:iconpandorasbox341:
PandorasBox341 Featured By Owner Jun 30, 2016  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
thanks for the watch! x
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:iconlionheartssj:
Lionheartssj Featured By Owner Jun 27, 2016  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Happy Birthday! :party::cake:
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:icondr-cryllius:
Dr-Cryllius Featured By Owner Jun 27, 2016  Student General Artist
Happy Birthday
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:iconwolfwithglasses:
WolfwithGlasses Featured By Owner Jun 27, 2016
Happy Birthday. ^^
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:iconbirthdays:
birthdays Featured By Owner Jun 27, 2016
:woohoo: :party: :iconcakelickplz: !!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY !!! :iconcakelickplz: :party: :woohoo:

It's June 27th which means it's that time of the year again and your special day is here! We hope you have an awesome day with lots of birthday fun, gifts, happiness and most definitely, lots of cake! Here's to another year!

Many well wishes and love from your friendly birthdays team :love:

---
Birthdays Team
This birthday greeting was brought to you by: KoudelkaW
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:icondauverney:
Dauverney Featured By Owner Jun 27, 2016  Student Traditional Artist
Thanks for the watch and happy birthday! I hope you have an awesome day :heart:
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:iconrunekatashima:
RuneKatashima Featured By Owner Jun 27, 2016
Happy Birthday!
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:iconm4ian:
M4IAN Featured By Owner Edited Jun 27, 2016
Happy Birthday.

Hope your felling better.
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:iconthe-noisemaker:
The-NoiseMaker Featured By Owner Jun 26, 2016  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Thank you so much for the watch!! :la: And happy early birthday as well!!
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:iconboonchieboy:
Boonchieboy Featured By Owner Jun 26, 2016  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Happy Birthday!Have your cake and eat it too 
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:iconlintu47:
Lintu47 Featured By Owner Jun 24, 2016  Hobbyist General Artist
Happy early Birthday! :happy birthday: by iDJPanda
:iconflyingheartsplz: birthday cake by Chibivillecute :iconflyingheartsplz:
Have a wonderful day! :happybounce:
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:iconknighta3:
KnightA3 Featured By Owner Jun 10, 2016  Hobbyist Digital Artist
:iconthxwatchplz:
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:iconnogoojing:
nogoojing Featured By Owner May 6, 2016
Thanks for the watch!!
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:iconpomnoi:
Pomnoi Featured By Owner Apr 13, 2016  Student Digital Artist
Thank ye for the watch! :iconhandsomeonionplz:
You have a beautiful art style! ♥
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:iconlittle-noko:
Little-Noko Featured By Owner Apr 5, 2016  Professional Digital Artist
thank you for the watch !
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:iconfoxy-sierra:
Foxy-Sierra Featured By Owner Apr 5, 2016  Hobbyist General Artist
Thank you for the watch! YOUR ART IS AMAZING!!!
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:iconmega1126:
MEGA1126 Featured By Owner Apr 1, 2016  Student Digital Artist
OMG.. THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THE WATCHLa la la la La la la la 
it means a lot for me..
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:iconxxdhxx:
xxdhxx Featured By Owner Mar 29, 2016  Hobbyist General Artist
Wow, thank you for the watch! :heart: :rose: You have some really awesome art going on in your gallery~
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:iconjwiesner:
JWiesner Featured By Owner Mar 29, 2016  Professional
:iconbowingplz: Thank you very much for the +Watch! It means a great lot to me.

Have a nice day! ^-^
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